there are time when the world is quiet enoughbut there are times when it isn’tthe swell creeps up slowlywhile i’m not paying attentionwhile i’m otherwise occupiedwhile i’m thinking that the world is quiet enoughbut then it’s screamingand i’m screaming so loudlythat i can’t hear myself thinkthat everything is so loudand bright and janglyand all the…
Category: Creative
okay, so
okay, so i just wanted to let you know that i hope it’s okay for me to have even thought about saying what i was thinking about saying if it isn’t, please let me know (although i feel like you won’t) (i feel like your lack of saying anything is because you’re so offended that…
in that order
in the morningas i leave for work:i start the car,back out of the garage,close the garage door,and put on my seat belt in that order i’m annoyed by the nagging chimereminding me to put on my seatbeltbut it’s part of the routine if i don’t hear it,i will wonder(halfway to work)if i left the garage…
once upon a time
back in the dayswhen i was an alien(before i’d crawled into the fleshthat now calls itself me): i was free to soaramong the stars this is the freedomi seek to find againhidden deep in the labyrinthof my soul inside the husk of humanityi pretend to inhabitthere is a mei used to beuntil i decided it…
monsters and jigsaws
sixth grade: i hid my monstersin the closetat the back of the trailerthat was our classroom it had once been a bathroom,when the trailer had once been a home,but now it was a storage areafilled with stacks of papersand booksand the sort of office suppliesthat only teachers kept i was wedged in that closethiding from…
Sarcophagus / Cocoon
the woman who was the motherto the son i used to beis now a shellfilled with venom and bile her ancient skin is a sarcophagusmine is a cocoonhousing a frightened butterfly and i cannot stay mooredto her millstonefor i am to take flightand fly away 03.30.24
enough about me
but enough about melet’s talk about youlet’s talk about how you’ve shaped an image of me out of clay and mud and the pieces of last night’s dinner and a memory you had a long time ago about a person i’ve never even metlet’s talk about how once upon a time you were hurt by…
at the end
at the end of the path,at the end of the road,i am not autistic,i am not transgender,i am not disabled,i am just me,the me i have always been,hidden deep within the cocoon of me 04.28.23
yeah, eff that noise
i’ve come to a conclusion about my mental healthbut i’ll get back to that prologue:when i was youngi remember people talking about autismas if it were pitiable, contagious, debilitating spoken of in hushed tonesdid you hear about margaret?her son is…the word is barely audible by the time i saw rain manthe concept had become cemented…
ophelia sleeps
my skull is hollowas if i could crawl inside of itfold my whole body into itself i’m looking aroundfor a hint of emotionsof colorof love or rageof red or green or yellowbut there is nothing just an expansive voidsand on the oceansideeroding away underthe wave’s caress i want to be presenthere in the nowbut there…