This morning I saw a tweet that implied that cis people who use “(he/they)” or “(she/they)” in their email signatures but who present in a way that matches their gender are being opportunistic. One reply referred to it as virtue signaling, and another mocked someone who said their pronoun is “she” but that neutral pronouns…
Category: Bein’ Enby (Medium)
Mirrors, Windows, and Nonbinary Literature
A recent conversation about Jeff Garvin’s “Symptoms of Being Human” reminded me of the literary concept of mirrors and windows. Two of my favorite TikTokers are @finngerhardt and @mx.deran, and these two illustrate the concept well. The bulk of @finngerhardt’s TikToks are deliberate windows: The purpose is to educate cis folks about being allies to nonbinary people; these videos…
Learning to Breathe: Pronouns
I have come to dislike pronouns. That’s not quite true. I like the concept of pronouns. I was well inducted into the School of Rufus Xavier Sarsaparilla. I see that it’s important to be able to refer to a person without having to use, or even know, their name. But English, like its Indo-European siblings, messed it…
For Teachers: “How Should I Ask For Students’ Pronouns?”
As another school year begins, here comes that question again: “As a teacher, how should I ask students for their pronouns?” To be clear: What follows is my own personal opinion. Nonbinary people are not a monolith. Read multiple opinions, as many as you can find. Also, I laud the effort of any cisgender, heterosexual teacher…
The Clothes That Make the Man
Once upon a time, Eddie Izzard (who was at the time presenting as a man) said, “They’re not women’s clothes. They’re my clothes. I bought them.” This is how easy the logic should be: People can wear whatever they want to wear. Clothing has no inherent gender. Our modern definitions of “what men wear” and…
Should People Who Aren’t Nonbinary Use Mx.?
Like most Indo-European languages, English has a lot of gendered words. Most have standard gender neutral alternatives (boy/girl/child, brother/sister/sibling, etc.), and a few do not (Sir/Ma’am, aunt/uncle, niece/nephew, etc.). This article is specifically about Mr./Ms./Mx., but I’ll start with niece/nephew. The nonbinary/genderqueer community has suggested a few gender neutral forms, the most prevalent being “nibling”….
Trans-Friendly Pronouns: An infographic
I designed this for teachers who prefer a visual summary of the key ideas on pronoun use for transgender and nonbinary students. I also have longer text-based pieces for those who want more details: Non-Binary Students; Non-Binary “They” and Style Guides; Non-Binary Students and Pronouns (Infographic last revised 5/23/21.)
Degendering your language: An infographic
I designed this for teachers who prefer a visual summary of the key ideas on degendering language. I also have longer text-based pieces for those who want more details: Non-Binary Students; Non-Binary “They” and Style Guides; Non-Binary Students and Pronouns. A separate issue: “Parents” can be problematic because not all of your students will have or live…
What’s in a Name?
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my name. My legal name is “Paul”. It’s the name I’ve worn most of my life. When I was too young to remember, I was Timmy. That was based on my middle name, which is Timothy. My older brother went by Mark, his middle name, and I went…
Non-Binary Students and Pronouns
A Guide for Public School Educators In an earlier article, I discussed binarist language and provided some ideas for avoiding it with your students. In this article, I’m focusing specifically on pronouns. First of all, though: Thank you for taking the time to read what follows. For many people, the increasing visibility of non-binary persons and the accompanying…