but enough about melet’s talk about youlet’s talk about how you’ve shaped an image of me out of clay and mud and the pieces of last night’s dinner and a memory you had a long time ago about a person i’ve never even metlet’s talk about how once upon a time you were hurt by…
Month: April 2023
04.21.23
(I wrote this on my phone on 4/21, and transcribed it here on 4/29.) I can feel the friction when I write between the need for organization and the desire to scream whisper shout whimper stretch out big squeeze down small. Between the need for order and the demand for chaos and I don’t know…
hyperfixated infodump
the basic shape of the capital latin letter a has remained fairly unchanged since phoenicianfirst developed over three millennia agothe major change is that it was tipped overit is believed to have originally represented a ox’s headapparently greek scholars busied themselves with tipping over cowsin the fields the basic shape of the lower case latin…
at the end
at the end of the path,at the end of the road,i am not autistic,i am not transgender,i am not disabled,i am just me,the me i have always been,hidden deep within the cocoon of me 04.28.23
yeah, eff that noise
i’ve come to a conclusion about my mental healthbut i’ll get back to that prologue:when i was youngi remember people talking about autismas if it were pitiable, contagious, debilitating spoken of in hushed tonesdid you hear about margaret?her son is…the word is barely audible by the time i saw rain manthe concept had become cemented…
ophelia sleeps
my skull is hollowas if i could crawl inside of itfold my whole body into itself i’m looking aroundfor a hint of emotionsof colorof love or rageof red or green or yellowbut there is nothing just an expansive voidsand on the oceansideeroding away underthe wave’s caress i want to be presenthere in the nowbut there…
04.25.23
I’m feeling stagnant. The daily poems (word salads) have become mechanical, and I’m not sure how I’m feeling about them now. I’m in that mode of “only x to go” (which is now down to “only five to go”), so they’re feeling like a chore. I have books I want to read, but I keep…
some days
some dayswords flow from my fingertipslike a mighty riverslide from my lipsin a deafening torrentof insighta logorrheic overflowspread out on the pagein the aira feast for the ear and the eye other days…not so much 04.25.23
interlude 2
i had finally found my wayto the center of the labyrinth there was no minotaur hereno pile of bonesno evidence of the violencethat fill the ancient tales the only sound was quietthe steady rhythm of my own breathing it was a circular roomwith one entranceso with one exit nondescript white wallsplain and unassuming in the…
hanging on the telephone
when i was a childmy father gave me a broken telephone i took it apartunscrewed it as far as i couldleft it as a pile of piecesa metallic jigsaw puzzle i had no goal, no purpose in this dissectioni wasn’t trying to figure out how it workedi just wanted to see its innardslaid out before…